What You Say/What I Hear

my life is funny. i'm starting to have selective hearing. very selective hearing. we're talking beyond not hearing things that people are saying, or "tuning things out," as some people would put it. of course i "tune some things out..." i want to at least be able to present the semblence of sanity... if i had to listen to all the idiotic drivel that people out there say... in fact, its a sign that i'm tired and my defenses are wearing thin when i find myself overhearing things more often. the more inane office chatter that filters into my actual functioning (yes it functions!) brain, the worse off i become. its a vicious cycle.

what i'm talking about is that i'm getting better at decoding "office-ese," or whatever you want to call it. its actually all very simple. let me give you the basics:

whenever anyone slightly above in the local hierarchy mentions your name and asks if you "have a second," it roughly translates into:

would you mind stepping over to my desk and leaning over it so i can ream your ass some more? (and not in the fun way...)

this also applies to when your email icon starts blinking that you have a new message.

you know, i might be crazy, but i'm beginning to think that i don't like it here...